Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Spotting as an accessory

Yeah, well, I started spotting beige last night, and it's still here today.

I spent most of the night praying, playing my meditation CDs in my head, and reminding myself that spotting before beta happens all the time with perfectly viable pregnancies. Spotting is not uncommon with IVF-ers. It could be old blood or other internal goo from the ER or ET. It could be leftover from the start of implantation. It could come from one of two implanting embryos deciding to disengage. It could be nothing specific. Or it could be my period trying to start. (DH rightly pointed out last night that the period option is, at least, outnumbered.)

I'm at 12dpo/9dp3dt. My tests are still getting darker and I'm seeing "Pregnant" on digitals. All that's reassuring for now.

Once I finished approving this morning's HPTs, I shot myself up with a nice dose of womb-enhancing progesterone, breathed deeply, and got dressed. For my own brand of "I refuse to wig out" calming distraction, I accessorized externally to complement the shade of my unseen companion: beige-based argyle sweater, light khaki socks, camel eyeshadow, and a small spritz of Coco for kicks and whiffs. Oh, and I'm listening to Diana Krall in my office. She's kind of beige.

Doing my best to go with the flow.

Dare ya to call me a weirdo to my face!


Anonymous said...

I know it is way easier sad than done but please try and relax, while keeping up your positive affirmations.

I spotted brown and pink for more than a week with my current pregnancy and freaked out since I too have had my share of losses. Luckily everything is fine so far, I've had two ultrasounds and a confirmed heartbeat and am hoping the same for you. My doc ordered progesterone for me and that definitely helped with the spotting, I'm positive it will work for you as well!

Keep your chin up and we're all rooting for you!

Jaime Lynne said...

Sending positive thoughts your way!

Thank you for having the courage to share your journey!

Polly Gamwich said...

I think it's hilarious that you match your outside to your insides ... too cute.

The thing I will tell myself next time is "many healthy pregnancies spot or bleed - it does not mean bad things are destined!"

And I love that DH said AF was outnumbered ... too funny!

Opus #6 said...

Oh my gosh, I love Diana Krall! I'm sending super sticky vibes your way.


Keeping faith that things are just getting settled for the long haul.

You're a riot... :)

Tiffany said...

Loving DH's comment. Glad your tests are nice and dark. It is okay to spot in early pregnancy, be happy... and take a deep breathe. Right now, you are pregnant. How exciting!

Lisa said...

The tests getting darker is the most important thing right now. Unfortunately you're in limbo land and there's no way around it. You have to drive through it to get to the other side. :-/ I guess it's a beige car you're driving.

It's going to be okay, I know it...lots of reasons for discharge/spotting. If it's not red or copious, try to focus on other things if you can. I know, if.

I don't think of Diana Krall as beige. More plum I think....must just be me. :)

Evil Stepmonster said...

If its not bright red you're definitely still PUPO! Hang in there!

Tara said...

I am keeping the positive thoughts headed your way. I am excited for you - Those f-ing digital tests have never said that beloved word to me! How awesome to get to see that :)

I hope the spotting is gone in the morning.

I am here cheering for you!!!!

AnotherDreamer said...

Hopping over from the bar, and sending you support.

Hope it works out!

Ms Heathen said...

Abiding and hoping with you as you sit and wait, Lisa.

Sending many positive thoughts your way.

Kristin said...

Visiting from the lushary...wishing you the best of luck. It is wonderful that the tests are still getting darker.

Joonie said...

Sweetie, I know that seeing spotting can be scary. But it really doesn't mean anything. So try and put it out of your head if you can.

Hang in there love,I'm sending you lots of long distance hugs.

FattyPants said...

Dropping by from the lushary. Not sure if it helps but I bled, and I mean red, for the first 12 weeks of my pregnancy for no known reason and everything turned out fine. I'm hoping your spotting stops soon.