Monday, July 21, 2008


My IVF nurse just called with my most recent HCG reading. It's 9.82 — low enough that the clinic doesn't need to check it again. I think it's hilarious that I'd hoped for a single-digit report today and, for the first time ever when giving me a beta reading, they tacked on some decimals.

No matter. I am free from the needles! All post-D&C bleeding stopped last Wednesday (this was also the day on which I regained a nice semblance of hormonal sanity), and the no-bleeding thing has been a huge relief.

This Thursday I'll see Dr. K for a cycle debriefing. It's a "complimentary" consult, but I plan to get more than my money's worth. I've started a list of questions, the answers to which should help (we hope) narrow the focus of our decision-making discussions at home.

The nurse asked if we knew what decision we're leaning toward. Funny!

I didn't tell her that recent very serious considerations have included my getting an elective hysterectomy and rescuing a few more dogs (that was my insane self talking early on, and really meaning it); ditching the careers and opening a coffee shop on Norman Island (Travel Channel trance-a-thon, anyone?); somehow ramping up the careers, selling the house and cars, and moving into a tiny no-kids-allowed condo in the city; and — brace yourself for the big swing — draining our retirement savings and pursuing ART until something sticks or we are homeless.

Luckily none of those options sound brilliant anymore. Calm, practical heads all around.

Still, I have no idea what we'll do.


Opus #6 said...

((((hugs)))) to you. Glad to hear your hcg is down so you don't have to suffer more procedures. Praying peace and healing for you and your family.

Mrs.X said...

Ah, I remember when the HCG falling to single digits became a cause for celebration. The irony of it still hurts. The good news is that today, you don't have to make any decisions. Just be for a while and the path you want to take will show itself. Hugs.

bb said...

I know that waiting for that darn HCG to leave the system is torture. I don't remember exactly how long it took for me, but it seemed endless. Good luck to you at the follow-up appointment and with whatever decisions you make going forward. {hugs}

Ms Heathen said...

I'm so glad that your hcg levels have dropped and that you are freed from any more procedures.

I wish you peace and healing - whatever direction you choose to go in from here.

Evil Stepmonster said...

I'm glad the worst of the insanity is over. Mind you, I have seriously considered each of those options in moments when I thought I was perfectly sane.

Good luck with your next move.

Joonie said...

Oh, sweetie, you have been through so much. I'm glad you're hcg level have dropped and you're feeling better (physically anyway). Just know that I am thinking of you.