Friday, June 6, 2008

We have a heartbeat

The scan went well. We think it did, anyway!

Hard to believe, but there's an extra heart beating inside my body right now. It's flickering at 116 bpm, and the sight of it took my breath away. (DH squeezed my hand extra hard then too!)

Dr. K? Well, she played everything VERY close to the vest. We didn't expect a parade or anything, but we did expect some positive talk. Instead it was mostly neutral. Noncommittal, even. She clearly thought the baby was measuring on the smallish side and that the heart rate is on the low end of normal. We asked what concerns those possibilities raise, and she wouldn't give us any, citing nicely proportionate measurements and difficulty getting truly accurate readings this early. She wants to wait until the 9-week ultrasound to really register an opinion. She did utter the words "You're pregnant." So I know she thinks I am! But she said nothing remotely similar to "Things look good for now" or "Don't worry." Everything was a big, fat wait-and-see.

It was kinda strange, I must say. We weren't upset by it, and of course the doctor was perfectly friendly and professional, as always. But we did say "HUH?" the second we stepped outside the clinic's doors. I guess we'd expected a more upbeat vibe on what we felt was a milestone day. So it was a bit of a letdown.

I've decided that Dr. K has seen every outcome under the sun and simply has to maintain a bit of distance for this part of the process. Of course she is right — we will know more at 9 weeks. Then my OB will weigh in at 10 weeks and at every turn after that.

As DH said over breakfast afterward, "I guess we'll be biting our nails for a while."

I say heck with nail biting right now, though. I can't identify anything significant to fret about!


Anonymous said...

That is one of the most beautiful pictures I've ever seen. :) Congratulations. You have a heartbeat, what a miracle. I hope your doctor is just being a cautious Karen or something.

Anonymous said...

Fabulous!! Also, hb's get faster and slower - it'll be different at every visit!

bb said...

By all means - focus on the positive!!!! This is a wonderful time for you and your husband.

Good luck, and I can't wait to see the 9 week sono!

Joonie said...

It's wonderful to hear the heartbeat! Don't worry yourself too much with what could go wrong (I know easier said than done). Doctors can be kind of detached but don't read too much into it. Try and enjoy your pregnancy.

Anonymous said...

Yes, hold on to the positive and take one day at a time. It's so hard to not know the outcome (of anything in life), but put your heart in it and trust that it will work out. I'll be thinking of you. xxx

Polly Gamwich said...

What wonderful news! I can't wait til the 9w u/s and another breath-taking pic!

Ms Heathen said...

It must have been such a wonderful moment to see that heartbeat for the first time.

I am hoping as hard as I can that everything continues to go well for you, and that Dr K is just erring on the side of caution. Do try and enjoy this much-deserved pregnancy.